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More about getting old:
---Just before the funeral services, the undertaker came up to the very elderly widow and asked, "How old was your husband?" "98," she replied. "Two years older than me." "So you're 96," the undertaker commented. She responded, "Hardly worth going home, is it?
--- Reporters interviewing a 104-year-old woman: "And what do you think is the best thing about being 104?" the reporter asked. She simply replied, "No peer pressure."
--- The nice thing about being senile is you can hide your own Easter eggs .
--- I've sure gotten old!! ! 've had two bypass surgeries, a hip replacement, new knees. Fought prostate cancer and diabetes. I'm half blind, can't hear anything quieter than a jet engine, take 40 different medications that make me dizzy, winded, and subject to blackouts. Have bouts with dementia. Have poor circulation; hardly feel my hands and feet anymore. Can't remember if I'm 85 or 92. Have lost all my friends. But, thank God, I still have my driver's license.
--- I feel like my body has gotten totally out of shape, so I got my doctor's permission to join a fitness club and start exercising. I decided to take an aerobics class for seniors. I bent, twisted, gyrated, jumped up and down, and perspired for an hour. But, by the time I got my leotards on, the class was over.
--- An elderly woman decided to prepare her will and told her preacher she had two final requests. First, she wanted to be cremated, and second, she wanted her ashes scattered over Walmart.
"Walmart?" the preacher exclaimed. "Why Walmart?"
"Then I'll be sure my daughters visit me twice a week "
--- My memory's not as sharp as it used to be. Also, my memory's not as sharp as it used to be.
--- I've still got it, but nobody wants to see it.--- I'm getting into swing dancing. Not on purpose. Some parts of my body are just prone to swinging.
--- It's scary when you start making the same noises as your coffeemaker.
--- These days about half the stuff in my shopping cart says, "For fast relief."
--- I've tried to find a suitable exercise video for women my age, but they haven't made one called "Buns of Putty."
--- Don't think of it as getting hot Flashes. Think of it as your inner child playing with matches.
--- Don't let aging get you down. It's too hard to get back up!
--- Remember: You don't stop laughing because you grow old, You grow old because you stop laughing.
Thanks Ted!
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"Old Age is Not For Sissies!"
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'Profiling: Citizens do the job no one in Washington wants to do' from Michelle Malkin. Go here for the complete story.
For a video of Michelle talking about Young Muslim Males go here.
That's all for today folks. Have a good day.
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Correction. Just received this email from Leon and Carmen. I am listing it below in its entirety as received.
ROFLOL....I can just hear THAT. Do we know what program that was on so that we can get a transcript?????
Miss Cindy
"A.J."
A SMART GOOD OLE BOY!!
Even those who aren't particularly sympathetic to Bibi Netanyahu could get a good measure of satisfaction from his interview with the British Television this morning.
I guess it can be attributed to his days studying history at Harvard.
The interviewer asked him: "How come so many more Lebanese have been killed in this conflict than Israelis?" (A nasty question if there ever was one!)
Netanyahu: "Are you sure that you want to start asking in that direction?"
Interviewer: (Falling into the trap) Why not?
Netanyahu: "Because in World War II more Germans were killed than British and Americans combined, but there is no doubt in anyone's mind that the war was caused by Germany's aggression. And in response to the German blitz on London, the British wiped out the entire city of Dresden, burning to death more German civilians than the number of people killed in Hiroshima.
Moreover, I could remind you that in 1944, when the R.A.F. tried to bomb the Gestapo Headquarters in Copenhagen, some of the bombs missed their target and fell on a Danish children's hospital, killing 83 little
children. Perhaps you have another question?"
Now THAT is one smart man! Oh if that message could be heard everywhere.
Now I will quit.
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