Tuesday Misc.

The coach had put together the perfect team for the New Orleans Saints. The only thing missing was a good quarterback. He had scouted all the colleges and even the Canadian and European Leagues, but he couldn't find a quarterback who could ensure a Super Bowl victory.

Then one night, while watching CNN, he saw a war-zone scene in Afghanistan. In one corner of the ackground, he spotted a young Afghan warrior with a truly incredible arm.

He threw a hand-grenade straight into a window from 80 yards away. Then he threw another from 50 yards down a chimney, and then hit a passing car going 80 miles per hour.

I've got to get this guy!" the coach declared. So, he brings the young Afghan to the States and teaches him the great game of football ...... and sure enough the Saints go on to win the Super Bowl.

The young Afghan is hailed as a hero of football, but, all the young man wants to do is call his mother.

"Mom," he says into the phone, "I just won the Super Bowl!"

"I don't want to talk to you," the old Muslim woman says. "You deserted us. You are not my son!"

"Mother, I don't think you understand," pleads the son, "I've just won the greatest sporting event in the world!"
"No! Let me tell you," his mother retorts. "at this very moment there are gunshots all around us. The neighborhood is a pile of rubble. Your two brothers were beaten within an inch of their lives last week, and I have to keep your sister in the house so she doesn't get assaulted!"

The old lady pauses then tearfully continues, "I will never forgive you for making us move to New Orleans"

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Engineer in hell....

An engineer dies. He arrives at the Pearly Gates, but they don't let him in, so he goes to Hell. Hell is a pretty rotten environment. Right away, the engineer starts making improvements -- lights, bathrooms, air conditioning -- and after a while, Hell doesn't look so bad any more.

God notices this, and asks the Devil what's going on. "Well, it's this engineer we've got," says the Devil.

"Engineer?? You're not supposed to have any engineers in Hell!" says God. "There must have been a mistake. All engineers go to Heaven. Send him up here, right away!"

"No way," says the Devil. "We're keeping him here."

"I'll sue!!" cries God.

"Yeah, right," sneers the Devil. "Where you gonna get a lawyer??"

Thanks for these Ted!

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Ice Cream

Thank God for Children Saying Grace...

Last week I took my children to a restaurant My six-year-old son asked if he could say grace. As we bowed our heads he said, "God is good, God is great. Thank you for the food, and I would even thank you more if Mom gets us ice cream for dessert. And Liberty and justice for all, Amen!"

Along with the laughter from the other customers nearby I heard a woman remark, "That's what's wrong with this country. Kids today don't even know how to pray. Asking God for ice cream! Why, I never!"

Hearing this, my son burst into tears and asked me, "Did I do it wrong? Is God mad at me?"

As I held him and assured him that he had done a terrific job and God was certainly not mad at him, an elderly gentleman approached the table.

He winked at my son and said, "I happen to know that God thought that was a great prayer. "Really?" my son asked. "Cross my heart," the man replied.

Then in a theatrical whisper he added (indicating the woman whose remark had started this whole thing), "Too bad she never asks God for ice cream. A little ice cream is good for the soul sometimes."

Naturally, I bought my kids ice cream at the end of the meal. My son stared at his for a moment and then did something I will remember the rest of my life.

He picked up his sundae and without a word, walked over and placed it in front of the woman. With a big smile he told her, "Here, this is for you. Ice cream is good for the soul sometimes; and my soul is good already."

THE END

I loved this story! Please keep it moving. Sometimes we all need some ice cream. I hope God sends you some Ice Cream today.

Thank you Arnold.

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Tonight's thought:
"My job is to take care of the possible and trust God with the impossible."
~~ Ruth Bell Graham

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Random thoughts
By Thomas Sowell
Tuesday, August 29, 2006

Random thoughts on the passing scene:

Someone said that good judgment comes from experience -- which in turn comes from bad judgment.
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I have never seen a skinny cook.

Republicans have good reasons to be disappointed in their Congressmen, especially with their runaway spending and amnesty bill for illegal aliens. However, before Republican voters decide to stay home at the next election, or perhaps to vote for the Democrats, they might repeat one phrase to themselves: "Speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi."

Little kids can be adorable when they are asleep. Or maybe we are just so glad that they are asleep that this biases our feelings.
Read the complete article by using the link below this post.